My heart flutters with panic...and I send them away. I can't yell at them anymore. We have loved this brown haired baby boy for 2 weeks now. And he has been loved well. But it's easy to love a newborn who can't do anything for himself. How do I love the others? The ones who desperatly need me to love them. The babies who I have neglected these last days. The husband who has worked his heart out to take care of us. How do I love them well? And why is my heart racing with panic? Maybe it's because my hands have felt idle these last 2 weeks trying to recover. I have struggled to watch my husband do my job. I want to take over and let him rest. Then I do too much and I get exhausted. How can I love well when I am exhausted? I guess I still need time. Time to heal. Time to adjust. Time to learn. Time to sit and love well those who need loving.
Lord, teach me to love these you have given me. Calm my heart. Amen.